Reasons For Change (Dec. 5, 2009)

So, last night I decided to write a blog. It's been a while and these blogs have actually been a great way for me to work on the mental part of my weight loss.
I typed away and edited my little masterpiece for close to two hours.
When I was about ready to wrap things up, I heard a small pop and all of the electricity in my neighborhood went out. I sat there in the dark for a second while the realization of losing my work washed over me. Are you #*&%$ kidding me?
Instead of rewriting last night's blog, I thought that I'd share a list that my husband and I wrote up just before deciding on changing our lives forever.
I think we were stuck in the car, waiting for our daughter to get out of school when we started brainstorming. It's a bit redundant in parts, but here is what we came up with...

(Reasons We Eat Too Much)
boredom
oral fixation
taste
fulfilling
social activity
depression
food "high"
going too long without eating
not wanting to hurt the cook's feelings

(Reasons We Eat Crappy/Unhealthy Food)
convenience/fast
cost
quantity
little mess to clean up
can eat on the go
we're impatient

(Why We Fall Off The Diet Bandwagon)
results coming too slow
no money for healthy foods
events that revolve around eating/holidays
feeling of deprivation
taking time off of dieting turns into not dieting at all
the easy way out
hard to get back on track

(How We Feel When We Eat Unhealthy Foods Or Eat Too Much)
fat
disgusting
gross
unhealthy
slobbish
self loathing
depressed
uninspired
regretful
bad influence on the kids
feeling that kids are ashamed of us
unattractive

(The Way We Feel When We've Lost 20+ Lbs.)
thinner
healthier
happier
inspired
more attractive/sexier
productive
less achy
more willing to be out in public

(Important Reasons To Lose Weight)
health
save money
better looking
feel better
role model for kids
long life expectancy
do more things
antidepressant
sex life
less strain on healthcare system
less medications
discipline

(Personally, I'm Fat Because)
I'm addicted to being lazy
I've given up
I make poor choices regarding food and activities
I don't exercise
I don't cook at home
I'm not prepared with good foods
I have too many excuses
I enable my husband and he enables me
I eat when I'm bored or depressed
I eat even when I'm full
I don't plan out my menus and try to stretch my grocery dollar
I allow myself to be inactive and overweight
I don't care enough about my health and appearance

Not that this list was a huge revelation or anything. I just noticed that the word "depression" kept popping up. I've always thought of myself as a happy-go-lucky person most of the time and this made me realize how miserable my weight was making me.
It's only been three months since we wrote this list and I haven't even lost half of the weight that I intend on losing. But over the last three months, I haven't felt depressed at all. Simply changing my mindset, eating healthy foods and moving my body has changed me more than I realized.